I realise I haven't been updating this blog much lately. I guess there's not all that much to say - I figure people would get bored with the same old "tired, but slowly improving".
Last week I was at the hospital again for a blood test and the doctors were pleased at my recovery rate. Almost normal now, apart from the platelet count. But normal counts is misleading. The truth is I'm tired a lot of the time. This isn't the kind of 'ooh i went to bed late last night' tired. This tiredness infiltrates the core of you, sleeping for 12 hours has little effect on it. Then another day I'll get up and feel great. There doesn't seem to be a pattern to it. But I guess it's a good thing as it reminds me to take it easy. I'm always trying to get ahead of myself.
This morning I'm going to do a Yoga class. That should be gentle exercise enough and allow me to stretch my tendons a bit, which are so tight. I'll report back, but I'm expecting some pain...but good pain.
This morning I received a comment from a guy named Duane from New York who is also suffering with relapsed Hodgkin's. I started reading his blog and he has some interesting things to say. Journal of a Prize Fighter. Duane, I wish you all the best and thank you for the comments you've made and for following my blog.
I also want to take this opportunity to thank everyone who has been so supportive. By sending cards, emails, phoning me, etc. I don't think I'll ever be able to express how much this has meant to me.
In other news Imelda and I will be moving from our flat into a house, with garden in the near future! My mum and dad are buying it and letting us live in it for a low rent. I'm really looking forward to having a garden, extra bedroom, and, wait for it...workshop! That's right, a dedicated place that is only mine for all my tools and bikes. "where's Tom?", "He's in his tool-shed again!"
Before my mum and dad offered to do this we had decided to move anyway. While our flat has lots of happy memories, and I wouldn't even describe the past 2+ years as unhappy despite the difficulties we faced, moving will be a new start. A new chapter of my life will begin.
The fear? The fear is what I expect every cancer patient has. That "will I relapse?" thought. Right now I'm doing well with it. In the past I have gone into spirals of depression. Maybe this time it's because I was so ill from the chemo that I wonder how anything could survive that. Who knows how 'the fear' will develop over time.